Thursday 14 January 2021

Synonyms for Mathrubhoomi

 

I

 

i learned to hold ground for my feet today.

Very untoward is my feet to the ways of the terrain beneath
but
i learned to hold feet for my earth today.

 

II

 

While traversing the incurvations of this land-

a Mathrubhumi of rubber trees
somewhere in the verdigris of Kerala-

my family and i was constantly met with crests and indentations of the turf


                        small and large                  shallow and deep


And inside me moves the rise and dip of fear-


my fear for heightened surfaces           

                                                         my fear for depression surfaces                            

 
Fear traversing like slivers of smoke inside me,
s p r e a d i n g         i t s       s c e n t

holding me in its strange allure

 

and in response, my feet cower like curlicued claws

 

III

 

Rubber trees:

                       tall spare leaning sideways be-holding me

                       almost silver to look at against the opaline sky

                       like the luminous tresses of an elder woman

 

 

i continue the ascend, my arduous feet
upon Bhumi’s russet ebullient ways

 

 

Shedding copal amber leaves glide from rubber trees
displaying how even death Is grace

 

IV



I now reach another point of elevation            my fear arrives in tides
i wait to harvest will and courage           to take bounds and leaps like the child

 

i fail utterly and instead I pray                      while my body squats to meet the earth, borrowing anchor


My fingers and palms hold steadfastly to the
surging serpentine roots

my palms caressed by a recently rain sighed ochre coarse soil


And thus i make the mount to join my family-
And thus i become root bound.


"Trust the earth, Trust your feet.”

                                                              whisperings of a rumour


“Trust your earth, Trust the feet."


 

 

Another Slope

                            Downward.

                                                   Fall ?


V




i stand rooted at the arc of the earth mound.

Cumulus clouds deepen in libidinous dark-grey above

 

Everywhere were the architecture of eyes seeing me


“Trust your earth. Trust your feet”

 


my body must be earth-like     if     i ever were to meet earth.

Unbridling myself                             seeping all that I weigh into its cacao mud body


my breath : a scaffolder of grace                    releasing the burden of fear


i plunge: i land : i spring : i arrive            at the arms of my awaiting beloved.


 

This is how i sculpted faith from silence


 

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